Revenge is best served cold

After 20 years of marriage, Jake left his wife for his young  secretary.


His new girlfriend desperately wanted to live in Jake and his wife Edith's million-dollar mansion. Since Jake could afford better and more ruthless lawyers, he got to keep the house.

He gave Edith just three days to pack her things and leave the house. The first day she used to pack her things into boxes. On the second day, the moving company came and transported her things to her new apartment. On the third day, she enjoyed one last meal in her favorite room, the large and beautiful parlor. She lit a few candles, put on some background music, and treated herself to a small feast: a plate of shrimp with caviar and a bottle of champagne of the highest quality.

When she was finished, she went to all the rooms and stuffed the shrimp leftovers, dipped in caviar, inside all of the curtain rods. Afterwards, she cleaned up the kitchen and left.


Eventually, Jake returned with his new flame. For a couple of days it was as if the two were in paradise.

But then  it began to smell everywhere in the house. The smell became  torture. They tried everything — cleaning, wiping, and vacuuming. They checked the air-conditioning, thinking there may have been a dead mouse inside. The rugs were steam cleaned and they hung up air fresheners everywhere. Even exterminators came to drop the chemical death sentence on any possible vermin. But nothing helped.

As it worsened, visitors stopped visiting  the house. Even handymen refused to work in the house and the maid quit. Ultimately, the couple could no longer withstand the odor and decided to find a new home.

But it was like a curse: no one wanted to buy the house —  even after the price was halved after one month on the market. Rumors of the "stinkhouse" began to spread. Even realtors wanted nothing to do with the house. In the end, he had to take out a loan to buy a new house.  


Then one day his ex-wife called him and asked him how he was doing. He proceeded to complain about his ordeal with the house. She listened to his story politely. Then she told him how she missed the house and would be ready to lower his alimony payments if he would give her the house back.

Jake believed that Edith had no idea how horrible the smell really was. Rashly, he agreed. Under the condition that she signed the agreement on the same day. With the contract signed, she bought the house for a tenth of its actual worth. After a couple of hours, everything was settled.

A week later, Jake and his lover stood smiling and full of relief in front of the house, watching the moving company transporting everything from the house. INCLUDING THE CURTAIN RODS!